In preparation for crafting my final paper for Shakespeare 382, I have decided to write a blog post. The purpose for this is two-fold:
1.) To put it off just a smidge longer.
2.) I have found that if I warm up before writing, when I actually do start the real writing, the thoughts and ideas flow like homemade hot fudge from a chocolate fountain. Yum.
So to stimulate the neurons and dendrites in my brain, I will write a few poems. Please don't expect too much.
Christmas Haiku
I'm so excited
For Santa to come to town
And bring Christmas cheer.
Limmerick on My Bruise
There once was a bright college student
Who thought that it'd prob'ly be prudent
To wear her prom dress
To a bright Christmas fest
But she tripped and her shin got a blue dent. (aka: a bruise)
Sorry, that last rhyme was a stretch.
December Doggerel
During this season of joy
When every girl and boy
Is laughing and happy
And my hands are all sappy
From cutting a tree
That towers 'bove me
This is a time that I love the most.
Approaching is the night of my dear Savior's birth
Because of the season I'm full of much mirth.
I am more inclined
To reach out and be kind
I want to try harder to be just like Him.
And also my birthday is coming up fast
One more year of my life is almost all past
I'll be twenty one
Which means for some
That they get to drink beer
And have thoughts that ain't clear.
But not me cuz I'm Mormon
So I won't be stormin'
The bars on the night of my twenty-first year.
A final thought on this wonderful time
Is the fact that now falling are snowflakes sublime.
These small little flakes that cover my nose
Are just as pretty as a lovely red rose.
I try to catch them on my warm tongue
Which is red from the candy canes which I was supposed to have hung.
I love how the snowflakes are never the same;
They remind me that all of God's children aren't lame.
We are all different, but God knows us all,
He created us individually, big, short, and small.
And so with these thoughts in my heart I go on
To write a long paper and work until dawn.
But I won't forget Christmas spirit or snowflakes
'Cause they are the things that inside me now makes
Happy and warm with cheer and with love
Which are a reflection of what comes from above.
Merry Christmas everyone!
Monday, December 6, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Sad, Happy
Sad: Saying goodbye to church leaders whom I love and trust.
Happy: Having the opportunity to meet such wonderful people.
Sad: The beautiful leaves are falling off the trees.
Happy: The leaves make a lovely crunching sound when I step on them.
Sad: Not being with my family.
Happy: Having the best family in the world.
Sad: Realizing your fly was open all night.
Happy: Having one of your bestest friends try to use the force on you during that same night.
Sad:......can't think of any more.
Happy: I can't think of any more sads.
Happy: My roommates make me laugh all of the time.
Happy: My cellphone text message ringer (birds chirping)
Happy: Hockey.
Happy: Da Bears.
Happy: Movie nights.
Happy: God is real and prayer works.
Happy: Thanksgiving is almost here.
Happy: Christmas is right after that.
The list goes on and on.
Don't we live in a wonderful world?
What are you happy about?
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
The View From Under My Umbrella
Sometimes it's cold and cloudy, and the rain is coming down, and you have to pull out your rain boots and your big warm coat and your umbrella....
That's what I did on Monday, when the rain was coming down as I walked to class. As I was walking, I was looking at the inside of my umbrella, and at the tag in there, and the dangly velcro strap that wraps up the umbrella. And then all of a sudden, I looked out from underneath of the umbrella, and I saw the most beautiful bush. It looked like it was on fire, because the middle of each leaf was yellow, and then became more orange, then red, and then almost purple towards the edge of the leaf. I wish I could've taken a picture. It was the loveliest, most vibrant bush I've ever seen, and I'm so glad that I looked out from underneath my umbrella to see that bush.
Throughout the last week, I've been feeling cold and cloudy and rainy inside (as was evidenced by my last blog post). And I've decided to look around, and see the beautiful "bushes" all around me, because there are a lot of them.
I love....
hospital socks
hot chocolate
my family
my roommates
sweatpants
my Savior
BYU
friends
laughing
my warm, classy apartment
a healthy body
learning
teaching
technology
and tons more.....
I'm just grateful to be living in general. Life is a gift, and I'm trying not to forget that. I'm trying to remember to look around and appreciate life, instead of staying in a bubble of school work and stress all of the time.
Thanks, fiery bush.
Saturday, November 6, 2010
When Band Aids Don't Help
Do you ever hurt do deeply that you can feel it in your heart or your soul? I had two recent run-ins with emotional pain, and I write about it not to ask for sympathy, but just to express myself in my little space.
I visited my family for three days, and it was wonderful to be away from the pressures of school and the chilly weather. I loved being with my siblings, with whom I have a special bond that is not possibly replicable. Spending time with my parents was equally lovely; my mom's dances and my dad's chuckle make me feel whole and happy. Leaving them hurt. A lot. But I never cry at the airport because 1.) My mom takes care of that enough for the both of us and 2.) laughing it off makes it easier to deal with. The pain that comes with familial separation is deep, and rightfully so. If I hated my family, I wouldn't have this problem. I would rather have my family and the pain than a lame family and no pain. For real.
Less recently, I liked a guy who ended up not being as fantastic as I thought he was. For a few days, this guy made me laugh, and think, and cook pumpkin seeds in a way that I've never done it before. It was amazing. But then it all evaporated, and that was that. As I was gathering myself in preparation to write just a few minutes ago, I heard his laugh outside my window, and I felt my heart hurt again. And that sucks. That some guy can have the power to make me ache, just by laughing. I hate that. Why do I get so invested in something that is just going to cause pain later? Not sure. But I'm pretty sure that, in the guy department, it's better to stay guarded than get hurt over and over again.
So basically, I'm planning on having a good cry in the near future for two reasons:
1.) To give voice to my love for my family and the sadness that I feel at having to leave them.
2.) To express frustration at how easily I let myself fall for guys. Lame, lame, lame.
The good news is: Tomorrow is a new day, with unlimited possibilities.
I visited my family for three days, and it was wonderful to be away from the pressures of school and the chilly weather. I loved being with my siblings, with whom I have a special bond that is not possibly replicable. Spending time with my parents was equally lovely; my mom's dances and my dad's chuckle make me feel whole and happy. Leaving them hurt. A lot. But I never cry at the airport because 1.) My mom takes care of that enough for the both of us and 2.) laughing it off makes it easier to deal with. The pain that comes with familial separation is deep, and rightfully so. If I hated my family, I wouldn't have this problem. I would rather have my family and the pain than a lame family and no pain. For real.
Less recently, I liked a guy who ended up not being as fantastic as I thought he was. For a few days, this guy made me laugh, and think, and cook pumpkin seeds in a way that I've never done it before. It was amazing. But then it all evaporated, and that was that. As I was gathering myself in preparation to write just a few minutes ago, I heard his laugh outside my window, and I felt my heart hurt again. And that sucks. That some guy can have the power to make me ache, just by laughing. I hate that. Why do I get so invested in something that is just going to cause pain later? Not sure. But I'm pretty sure that, in the guy department, it's better to stay guarded than get hurt over and over again.
So basically, I'm planning on having a good cry in the near future for two reasons:
1.) To give voice to my love for my family and the sadness that I feel at having to leave them.
2.) To express frustration at how easily I let myself fall for guys. Lame, lame, lame.
The good news is: Tomorrow is a new day, with unlimited possibilities.
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
Will you go out with me?
It's Girls' Choice week in our ward. All of the girls were told by our church leaders to go and ask a boy in our ward on a date. Our apartment went through the process of asking boys last night, a process that is more intense than a Supreme Court nomination hearing. Seriously.
The process of a girl asking a boy out is never simply "girl plans date, girl picks guy, girl calls guy, girl asks guy, guy says yes or no." It's just not the way it works. Let me explain. And keep in mind that girls almost always do this kind of thing in a group.
First: The girls congregate in a room, having already made the decision to go on a group date. The room should be well-lit; should any excited flailing or depressed rocking in the fetal position occur, it is best to be able to see so as not to smash into things (walls, beds, desks with sharp corners, each other, etc...).
Second: The girls begin to list possibilities for who each should go out with. Each girl comes up with at least two boys to ask, and suggests choices for others to ask. If there are overlaps in date options, a negotiation process begins that goes a bit like this: "You should ask him." "No, YOU should ask him." No, no, really, I want YOU to ask!" "No, seriously, I will be sad if you don't ask him." "K fine, but only if you are REALLY okay with me asking him." "Yes, for reals, but you know, if you're not sure, I can ask him instead." "K then you ask him." And so on.
Third: Each girl must either support or refute another girl's choices. The support or the refute must be audible (and by audible I mean people two floors beneath us will be able to say, "Hmm, not sure who that girl was supporting, but I'm going to say that there's some definite 'yes' vibes there."). Also, the "yea" or "nay" to a boy must be accompanied by a reason. Reasons can be as deep as "He talks a lot about himself, and if you are going to have fun, you want to have an even conversation, so maybe you shouldn't ask him" or they can be more simple: "He's weird. Don't ask him."
Fourth: Based on her own perceptions and the support of her friends, the girl chooses a boy to ask, and calls him up, usually outside the room. The dialing process is done with the precision of a watchmaker, because heaven forbid that the girl call the wrong number.
Fifth: When the boy picks up, it is necessary and proper to carry on a short, flirtatious conversation involving small talk, and then casually asking a boy out, and providing him with the details (when, where, what, why......NO JUST KIDDING, DO NOT TELL HIM WHY YOU ASKING HIM OUT! THOSE REASONS ARE TO STAY CONFINED TO THE AIR SPACE OF THE ROOM THAT THE CHOOSING/DEBATING HAS TAKEN PLACE IN.)
Sixth: While the other girls are listening, the boy responds with a yes - "Yes, I would love to." Or no - "I'm sorry, I'll be out of town." A maybe - "I might have plans that night." may also be a response. Once a response is received, the girl calmly concludes the conversation and goes back into the room where the other girls are waiting.
Seventh (and finally) - When the girl reenters, depending on the response she is given, she is met by either strains from the Hallelujah chorus, looks of dismay and cries of support, or "WHAT?!?!? He MIGHT have plans already? What a freak! He doesn't deserve you anyway." Then comes the asker's outburst of emotion, either weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth, or excited dancing not unlike that of pro football players who have just scored a touchdown.
So what can we learn from all of this? That if the UN were ever dominated by women, the UN council meeting place would need to be a soundproofed room with padded walls? Maybe, but probably not.
I would conclude that this kind of thing makes life exciting, that fun and happiness and laughter and tears and sadness are all parts of this fantastic life that we are living. The fact that God gave us the capacity to feel so strongly about things big and small is amazing, and I can't wait to keep riding the emotional roller coaster of life. Hopefully though, our apartment won't participate in these Girls' Choice weeks too much; we would probably lose at least one girl every month to heart attack/aneurism.
The process of a girl asking a boy out is never simply "girl plans date, girl picks guy, girl calls guy, girl asks guy, guy says yes or no." It's just not the way it works. Let me explain. And keep in mind that girls almost always do this kind of thing in a group.
First: The girls congregate in a room, having already made the decision to go on a group date. The room should be well-lit; should any excited flailing or depressed rocking in the fetal position occur, it is best to be able to see so as not to smash into things (walls, beds, desks with sharp corners, each other, etc...).
Second: The girls begin to list possibilities for who each should go out with. Each girl comes up with at least two boys to ask, and suggests choices for others to ask. If there are overlaps in date options, a negotiation process begins that goes a bit like this: "You should ask him." "No, YOU should ask him." No, no, really, I want YOU to ask!" "No, seriously, I will be sad if you don't ask him." "K fine, but only if you are REALLY okay with me asking him." "Yes, for reals, but you know, if you're not sure, I can ask him instead." "K then you ask him." And so on.
Third: Each girl must either support or refute another girl's choices. The support or the refute must be audible (and by audible I mean people two floors beneath us will be able to say, "Hmm, not sure who that girl was supporting, but I'm going to say that there's some definite 'yes' vibes there."). Also, the "yea" or "nay" to a boy must be accompanied by a reason. Reasons can be as deep as "He talks a lot about himself, and if you are going to have fun, you want to have an even conversation, so maybe you shouldn't ask him" or they can be more simple: "He's weird. Don't ask him."
Fourth: Based on her own perceptions and the support of her friends, the girl chooses a boy to ask, and calls him up, usually outside the room. The dialing process is done with the precision of a watchmaker, because heaven forbid that the girl call the wrong number.
Fifth: When the boy picks up, it is necessary and proper to carry on a short, flirtatious conversation involving small talk, and then casually asking a boy out, and providing him with the details (when, where, what, why......NO JUST KIDDING, DO NOT TELL HIM WHY YOU ASKING HIM OUT! THOSE REASONS ARE TO STAY CONFINED TO THE AIR SPACE OF THE ROOM THAT THE CHOOSING/DEBATING HAS TAKEN PLACE IN.)
Sixth: While the other girls are listening, the boy responds with a yes - "Yes, I would love to." Or no - "I'm sorry, I'll be out of town." A maybe - "I might have plans that night." may also be a response. Once a response is received, the girl calmly concludes the conversation and goes back into the room where the other girls are waiting.
Seventh (and finally) - When the girl reenters, depending on the response she is given, she is met by either strains from the Hallelujah chorus, looks of dismay and cries of support, or "WHAT?!?!? He MIGHT have plans already? What a freak! He doesn't deserve you anyway." Then comes the asker's outburst of emotion, either weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth, or excited dancing not unlike that of pro football players who have just scored a touchdown.
So what can we learn from all of this? That if the UN were ever dominated by women, the UN council meeting place would need to be a soundproofed room with padded walls? Maybe, but probably not.
I would conclude that this kind of thing makes life exciting, that fun and happiness and laughter and tears and sadness are all parts of this fantastic life that we are living. The fact that God gave us the capacity to feel so strongly about things big and small is amazing, and I can't wait to keep riding the emotional roller coaster of life. Hopefully though, our apartment won't participate in these Girls' Choice weeks too much; we would probably lose at least one girl every month to heart attack/aneurism.
Friday, October 29, 2010
Testing 1, 2, 3
I gave in. I created a blog. The birth of this little patch of cyberspace which is mine was initiated by two people, namely an inspiring roommate and a motivational speaker (who does not live in a van down by the river). The speaker encouraged her audience to create a space of their own, a space where they could think and express.
So here I am, in my space, where I intend to do some serious jamming, hence the title. And even if nobody reads this, I will call it SpaceJam and it will be mine and it will be my SpaceJam. Just fyi: this blog will inevitably be loaded with movie quotes. Perhaps I will offer a prize for whoever can identify the most movie quotes. Perhaps.
And now it's time for some serious productivity, but before I sign out, I would just like to throw out a question into the vast expanse which is the internet. Why is it that the bleak rainy clouds can make me just as happy as the bright shining sun?
So here I am, in my space, where I intend to do some serious jamming, hence the title. And even if nobody reads this, I will call it SpaceJam and it will be mine and it will be my SpaceJam. Just fyi: this blog will inevitably be loaded with movie quotes. Perhaps I will offer a prize for whoever can identify the most movie quotes. Perhaps.
And now it's time for some serious productivity, but before I sign out, I would just like to throw out a question into the vast expanse which is the internet. Why is it that the bleak rainy clouds can make me just as happy as the bright shining sun?
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